I recall spending way too many hours worrying if I'd be asked and, if I was, what I'd wear. Sometimes, homecoming was disillusioning; other times if was exhilarating. Now, as a mother, there are moments when I laugh at how naive I was to assume the same adolescent shenanigans would one day seem insignificant to me. The truth is, they're more significant than ever--they just feature a new cast of characters.
Granted, none of my brood are quite old enough for formals yet, but I can already taste the jitters, the anticipation, the inevitable broken hearts, and the unforgettable moments that I kept framed and on my desk well into my years at Northwestern. And then . . . there are scenarios like the following, made all the more relevant because one of my children has special challenges/needs: http://www.littlethings.com/homecoming-dance-surprise/?utm_content=buffer55fd6&utm_source=ild&utm_campaign=ild&utm_medium=Facebook.
When I read this, my first thought went to my son, CJ. He doesn't have Down's. Nevertheless, being diagnosed with autism spectrum disorder (ASD) doesn't always lend itself to finding a partner on the playground--or a date to the school dance. That said, my son's peers have forever been a phenomenal bunch; they go out of their way to high-five him both in and out of school, and he gets invited to birthday parties from both his gen-ed and multi-needs classes. All the same, elementary school is a whole different ball game than high school; people change, and so do their priorities. So, I perused the article above, I asked myself--"Will CJ have a date when it's time for his homecoming?"
The answer is . . . I don't know. However, what give me faith are people like the kids in this story. Not only Daniel's date (who seems AMAZING), but the countless other classmates who helped plan a night that went beyond his wildest expectations. The best part is that they didn't see a disability--they just saw a person who required a little kindness to make the same memories that so many of us take for granted. In the wake of a political race in which one of the candidates (and now our president-elect) so shamelessly mocked a reporter who perhaps wasn't the "same" as everyone else, we need more notes to self of how/why there's another way to go. Now more than ever, kids--and adults for that matter--could stand a reminder that kindness is always a bigger game-changer than close-mindedness and ignorance.
The game-changing kindness: Through multiple acts of kindness, teenagers gave one of their classmates a homecoming to remember.
How it changed the game: Daniel's story started with the sadness of rejection but ended with a celebration of friendship.
How it could change my/your game: Our differences/challenges/needs are part of us, but they don't define us. Kindness allows us an incredible gift--to look beyond labels and preconceived ideas and the pain of judgment. By letting it shape our day-to-day lives and decisions, we go back to that place where we're all human beings, memory-makers who share what truly is a wonderful life.
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